Q & A with Co=
urtney
E. Martin
Author of PERFECT
GIRLS, STARVING DAUGHTERS
(Free Press; Apri=
l 17,
2007)
1.&n=
bsp;
What is a perfect girl? A starv=
ing
daughter?
A perfect girl is y=
our
daughter, your best friend, your nemesis, maybe even you. She is that voice
inside almost all of us that wants so badly to have an ideal body that she =
will do whatever it takes to get it—spend more t=
ime at
the gym, skip lunch, try fad diets, compete with other women, maybe even get
plastic surgery. Her voice is critical, merciless, and very hard to ignore.=
The starving daught=
er is
also all around, though far less easily heard or seen in our culture of
obsessive self-improvement. She is the voice that begs you to slow down, wa=
nts
comfort and healing. Neglected, she craves chocolate and French fries, leads
you to binge on food instead of what you really need: self-love.
2.&n=
bsp;
How do girls’ relationshi=
ps
with their mothers and fathers affect their body images?
There are obvious w=
ays
that parents influence their daughters’ ideas about food and fitness,
such as the comments they make, the kinds of foods they keep in the house,
their rules about eating and exercise.
But there are also
critical but covert ways in which both mothers and fathers play powerful ro=
les
in how their daughters see themselves. If a mother tells her daughter that =
she
is beautiful and perfect, but then turns around, takes a look in the mirror=
at
her own reflection, and calls herself a “fat pig,” the latter is
the much clearer message. If a father tries to communicate his love through
food, instead of authentic connection, the daughter learns to fill her
“father hunger” with snacks not dialogue.
3.&n=
bsp;
You write that perfectionism in=
an
unintended side effect of feminism? How so?
Feminism told each =
of us,
“You can be anything,” but what we heard was “You have to=
be
everything.” In part, this message was twisted in=
our
heads because we watched a generation of superwomen take on the second shift
and still try to look good while doing it. We sensed their exhaustio=
n.
We also sensed that our legacy was to take the weight of the world on our
shoulders, but try to look perfect while bearing the load.
4.&n=
bsp;
What prompted you to write abou=
t the
frightening new normalcy of body hatred?
I have had few frie=
nds
since I hit adolescence who didn’t have unhealthy relationships with =
food
and fitness, if not full-fledged eating disorders. When I would express out=
rage
about this sad fact, many women responded with shrugs. “Get used to
it,” was the response. “This is just what it means to be a
woman.” I refused to believe that and wanted to write a book trying to
get others to, first of all, admit how bad it really is and then join me in
rejecting the idea that self-hate is a normal part of growing up a girl.
5.&n=
bsp;
How did you find the women you
interviewed?
I interviewed over =
100
women that I met through friends, women’s organizations, and over the
Internet. I conducted an informal online survey, but the majority of the
stories you read in Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters come from in-depth
interviews and close friends.
&n=
bsp;
6.&n=
bsp;
What is different about young
women’s body image issues today as compared to twenty years ago?
Eating disorders,
and eating disordered behavior, is far more rampant today than ever
before. In part, I believe this is due to the extreme makeover
culture—women are led to believe that they could look like Angelina J=
olie
if they only had enough willpower, even when it is physically impossible
because of their genetics and/or financial status. The ideal body type has
shrunk to the point of sickness—supermodels collapse on the runways w=
ith
acute anorexia. And worst of all, we have normalized dieting so that the
slippery slope into full-blown eating disorders is easier and easier to sli=
de
down.
7.&n=
bsp;
How have pop stars—like L=
indsay
Lohan and Nicole Ritchie—influenced
girls’ ideas about food and fitness?
There is a sad scar=
city
of good role models for young women in today’s pop landscape. Women l=
ike
Lindsay Lohan and Nicole Ritchie flaunt their
thinness and talk around their eating disorders instead of empowering their
young fans to be honest about their own struggles. Their lyrics are vacuous=
and
their commitment to bettering the world only as long-lasting at the photo-o=
p.
In addition, hip hop, the music of this generation, offers only roles as eye
candy for creative women, effectively silencing them and convincing them th=
at
their bodies are their only form of expression.
8.&n=
bsp;
But what about the obesity epid=
emic!?
The obesity epidemi=
c and
rampant eating disorders are really flip sides of the same coin. Both are t=
he
manifestation of an unhealthy attitude towards food and fitness in this
country. We exist on extremes—either obsessing or giving up. Instead =
of
turning to real foods and looking honestly at our lifestyles, we look to
dangerous diet pills to do the work for us. The result is a population
dangerously fat and dangerously thin and an absence of healthy, moderate
messages in the wider culture.
9.&n=
bsp;
You write that athletic involve=
ment
often serves as a cover-up for eating disorders. How so?
In my experience, a=
nd in
my research, I found that what was supposed to be the go-girl solution to a=
ll
girls’ problems—sports—was sometimes truly empowering, but
also sometimes led to eating disorders. I call it dedication as disease.
Oblivious, many coaches and parents continue to encourage diseased girls th=
at
they see as unusually dedicated athletes to strive for perfection. Many of =
them
end up hospitalized beyond the finish line, if they even make it there.
10. What
can we do about this seemingly irreversible trend?
There is no easy an=
swer,
of course, but I do believe that there is hope. It begins with each and eve=
ry
woman and girl in this country being honest about her relationship with her=
own
body, and taking responsibility to heal it. From there we must promote comm=
unities
that encourage compassion, whole foods, joyful movement, and shapely beauty=
. We
must raise our daughters with realistic expectations and encourage them to
prioritize wellbeing instead of always winning. We must all learn to let go
more—turn off the perfect girl voice inside of us, indulge the starvi=
ng
daughter in a healthy way, and get on with living ecstatically.
To talk further with Courtney E.
Martin about
PERFECT GIRLS, STARVING DAUGHTE=
RS,
please contact Jill Siegel at 212.698.1252 or jill.siegel@simonandschust=
er.com